Circus: Poems 42 -- 57


Magic

You cannot hope for happiness
Your thoughts are out of line
You only half accept your heart's desire

And half suspect your body's fire
Half in love with a martyr's cause
Half hoping to escape your laws

You need a magician to ease your head
And make your two halves whole.

 

Not Even

Half distressed half hoping
You take a long walk
And now you run

Wrinkles worries fade away
In the bleaching of the sun
Sunlight follows you as soon as

You leave your pillow --
Not even the sun wants to let you go.

 

Cold

I am cold
Sick and feverish
I feel my head

I have had a temperature
All day -- And now midnight
I see visions in my caravan

All the creatures of the night
Stand around my bed.

 

The Other Side

The other side of hope and calm
I know it anywhere
The other side's despair

I feel it growing thickly
It pats my yellowing locks
Then pulls and tugs away

Until it lifts me by the hair
And I am uprooted entirely.

 

Raucous

I have such a circus in my head
Of never ending jumping jacks
I cannot keep them still

They jostle for importance
And try to win my attention
They are such a rough lot

Tiny beating hearts they have
That call to win me back.

 

A Little Death

A little death occurred --
Not one to shake the universe
Or disturb the merry stars

A little death whereby a body
Is put completely out of sight --
Yet kept alive in that fertile oven

Of the head that keeps the body
Burning gloriously shining bright.

 

Reserve

Let it all go
See it drift away -- your worries gone
Look I let the moorings off --

Your yacht of stately reserve
Is now sailing out the quay
You're rather playful now

Your fleshly corporeal state is rotting
Let it go let it all go.

 

Wandering

I found myself in such a state
That I was lost to any advances
Conversation passed me by

Like birds in a blue sky
I was silent in and out --
People would now and then shout

At me to try to get through
But I was following the clouds about.

 

Celestial

Stars angels hosts dominations
Your playthings await you
Here on this Earth

We are but balls of memory
Loose strands of feeling
Unwoven sheets of cloth

We stand here naked
Awaiting your wrath.

 

State

Delirium --
It is a loosening of the eyeballs
A creaking of the joints

A certain quiver of the lips
A tortured pulling of the hair
Till whole hunks come away

An anxiousness that has come
Like a dying guest -- to stay.

 

Dust

I lift the body high
Here with its frail components
Its faltering blood

Its embittered weakened sense
Its fragile common sense
Its barely escaping sigh

I leave it here in the sawdust
Until the pump relents.

 

The Accident

Make me perfect
Make me whole
Fill the body -- fill the soul

Take the fractured bone
Here bloodied by the fall
And remake it into marble --

Hard and pure and seamless
That sculptor's perfect stone.

 

The Attraction

I had two hearts once
But one I put away
Two lips -- one to love

The other to betray
Two tales -- one the truth
The other I could not say

Double-headed freak --
I do this for pleasure and for pay.

Pleasure

Pleasure is a golden thing
Yet I fear it every day --
It has a roguish grin

That takes me whole away
And drops me on a Pacific isle
Where I laze each sunny day

No thoughts disturb my vacant smile
No happiness within.

 

Disappearing

It is like playing to a
Disappearing audience --
This feeling I have for you

Every trick proves futile
For this shuffling circus hack
I start to miss my cue

I see everything I lack
I cannot bring you back.

 

Wanting

Wanting does not go away
With the passing of the day
It becomes a finer thing

All dressed in clothes of stars
Pale moonlit mountains
And elegant headlight-less cars

Wanting only comes into sight
With the coming of the night.


Poems 1 -- 29 | Poems 30 -- 41 | Poems 42 -- 57 |

Poems 58 -- 79 | Poems 80 -- 104 |

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